I never felt the need of people in my life before. I was used to feel happy to be alone. but I don't know how and when this suddenly feeling of needed someone in my life exist. My luahan post that I wrote when I was 18 really get me.
I started to realize that to be alone is not a good thing (trust me I had been there). Everyone needed someone in their life to listen to their thoughts and share their happiness. I do believe that everyone in this world has their own soulmates. Maybe I just don't find it yet. or maybe I hv found it but I didn't think that we are meant to be together.
Let be honest, I have everything that I want. but yet I still feel lonely. I can watch all korean drama episodes all by myself but now I don't know why, I need somebody to watch it with me. I'm tired of listening to my own laugh. I want somebody to laugh and cry with me. Is this a sign of depression? I don't know or maybe it is just me.
Sometimes, I imagine that my soulmate are someone that is secretly reading my blog posts. Is there anyone out there who is brave enough to take me away from my loneliness world? I know that it will never happen. sigh. Someday, I hope I will meet a person who resembles me, Who is like me I believe that I’ll find that person. There has to be a fool like me somewhere. That person will also be waiting for me.
I don't have someone to talked or someone that I could express my feeling except God and this crooked blog. This is exceedingly hurtful for me to through all of this.
I'm not trying to get sympathy but I just need a good listener... Argh fuck it. And the time when I'm want forgetting someone that I shouldn't miss or remind it all over again but I can't. Because the term trying to forget someone is so awful because you‘ll never forget someone if you’re trying to forget them. And you cried all night long because you miss someone who didn't miss you back and you can't rid every pieces about them.
I decided to keep this as a draft cause I don't want people to think that I'm desperate or etc. but it's my blog so yeah. So instead of living under people's wishes and shadows for far too long I've decide to post it ( ゝω・)ノ






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